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              <text>ON SEPT 11, 2001 I WAS AT HOME AND UNEMPLOYED AT THE TIME.  I HAD JUST GOT MY OLDER SON OFF TO SCHOOL.  SEPT 11 HAS ALOT OF MEANING TO ME.  THIS DAY IS MY BIG BROTHERS BIRTHDAY WHO PASSED AWAY IN JUNE OF 1995.  I WAS GRIEVING.  BUT IN THE LIGHT I ALSO HAD A BLESSING OF HAVING MY YOUNGEST SON BORN ON SEPT 11, 1992.  HE HAD A WONDERFUL BIRTHDAY YESTERDAY.  AS I WAS SHEDDING TEARS FOR MY BROTHER WHILE THANKING THE LORD FOR MY SON I HAD THE TV ON AND WITNESSED THE SECOND PLANE CRASHING INTO THE WORLD TRADE CENTER. WITH ALREADY MIXED EMOTIONS WHAT DO YOU DO.  I WAS IN COMPLETE SHOCK.  I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE WITNESSED SUCH TRAGEDY WHILE TRYING TO BE HAPPY FOR MY SONS LIFE.  I WAS BLESSED FOR ONE WHILE CRYING OVER MANY.  IT HURT.  BUT AT THE SAME TIME I FELT LIKE I WAS ROBBING MY SON AND HIS DAY OF LIFE.  HOW DO YOU COPE WITH MIXED FEELINGS.  YOU PRAY AND I DID.  THAT IS THE REASON MY SON HAD A WONDERFUL 2002 BIRTHDAY YESTERDAY.  I PRAYED.  I PRAYED FOR THE VICTIMS AND THEIR FAMILIES WHILE PRAYING TO THE LORD AND THANKING HIM FOR THIS GLORIOUS DAY THAT MY SON COULD SEE HIS 10TH BIRTHDAY. I AM BLESSED.
TO ALL THOSE WHO HAVE LOSTED LOVED ONES, WHETHER ITS SEPT. 11 OR OTHERWISE, I DO UNDERSTAND.  I UNDERSTAND THE HURT AND THE PAIN OF LOSING YOUR LOVED ONE. MY BROTHER WAS MY BEST FRIEND AND I MISS HIM DEARLY AS WOULD THE FAMILIES OF VICTIMS OF SEPT. 11, 2001.  
SHELIA JONES
LEXINGTON, KY</text>
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              <text>September 11,2001 is like the day President Kennedy was shot..You can recall every moment of the horror and never forget..I can relive every second of 9/11 and play it over and over again in my mind..
Like every other morning i woke up about 7 and made coffee and opened my back door and thought what a beutiful day..The weather was perfect and it was a great start for my vacation..About 8 I went on my computer to check email and bank account..I went in the kitchen for more coffee and looked at the tv and saw the smoke comming out of the first tower..I listened to the morning tv host mentioning a small plane crashed into the tower and from the corner of my eye I saw the second plane crash into the second tower..I thought oh my God what is going on..I watched in horror as people were jumping to thier deaths before TV editors could cut the horrible scenes..Whene the pentigon was hit and the plane went down inPA I thought Am I next..I didnt know whene or where the next plane would hit..I called my son who works about 50 miles from here and told him to stop working and go home,we were under a terroist attack..So many lost thier lives that day and living on the east coast you either lost family, friend,or knew someone that did..In my case It was a former co worker..Her son was one of the pilots that went into the world trade center and many customers from the company I worked for were lost and one of my favorite authors Barbera Olsen,Who I had watched often and got me interested in politics..
September 11,2001 Is a day I will never forget and can only hope and pray never to see another day like that again..</text>
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              <text>I grew up in New Jersey and one of the things I will always remember is being able to look out the window and see the magnifcient New York skyline, with the World Trade Center buildings standing so proud and tall.
I was at home on September 11, 2001, when I received a phone call telling me that the first tower was burning. At first I thought that it was a joke, but then rushed to turn on the news. I was horrified by what I saw. Not only was the first tower burning, they were showing footage of the second tower being hit by a jet. Shocked and not sure exactly what it was I was watching, I sat down glued to the television. 
A short time later I watched the first tower crumble to the ground. I cried for the poor souls who were still in the building, knowing that there was no way a person could survive. I cried for our country as it became apparent we were under attack from an unspeakable evil. I cried for the people at the Pentagon and the passengers on flight 93. I knew that things would never be the same again.
Through all this I was trying to call my daughter. She had just married a Marine two months before and I feared for her safety on the base they are stationed at. I wanted her home with me, along with the rest of the members of my family. I feared for my new son-in-laws life, knowing that he may just have to give his life for his country.
After watching the news all day and night the events that happened that day still didn't make sense. The loss of so many innocent people. I will never forget the sights and sounds I witnessed that day. I will never forget the fear and anger I felt. I take comfort in the fact that evil did not win that day. Our country became more united then ever before. And a year later I witnessed that our country was still united. Evil will never win a fight with goodness.</text>
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              <text>On September 11, 2001 it seemed as if it was an ordinary rushed morning.  I had poured my coffee and I was on my way down to the basement to iron my work clothes, when the phone rang.  I hesitated answering it since I was already running a bit behind but I did.  My girlfriend had called and asked if I had my t.v. on, I replied no, she suggested I should turn it on and we would talk later. My son was dressing in our family room and was getting ready for school when I promptly turned off the PBS channel and turned on the local news.  I could not believe my eyes, one of the worlds largest buildings was on fire and I sat in amazement when I suddenly saw another plane, in view, fly into the other tower.  I screamed in fear and utter amazement as I watched the building implode.  My son looked at me and asked me over and over what was happening.  I was in a state of shock and my eyes had glazed over with sheer fear and confusion.  I looked at him and he looked as confused and scared as I was and I had never even thought about explaining to my 4 year old, at the time what was happening.  I calmly told him that a building had caught on fire and lots of people were in those buildings.  

I decided to turn off the t.v. at that point since he kept staring at the t.v. and I was afraid that he would hear one of the news commentators talk about the plane hitting the buildings.  I decided at that moment not to try to explain to him that someone had purposely hit those buildings.  I never thought that the world of terroism would come so close to home.</text>
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              <text>It was just a regular day in school, went to first period half asleep and didn't even know a tragedy was going on as I sat there wishing the minutes away.  Then second period came around and i trudged into trig. class.  My teacher was lecturing on something to do with triangles when his phone rang.  This was not an out of the ordinary thing to occur during class.  But this phone call was different, a look of disbelief fell upon my teacher's face and he quickly hung up the phone, ran across the room and turned on the TV.  There it was, the first tower on fire with news reports coming in none stop.  Questions immediatly flew around the room as my classmates tryed to comprehend what we were seeing.
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              <text> Beginning my rush-of-a-morning at 5:00 was the usual result of my procrasination. In that case, the race to place a worthy conclusion on my English paper was nothing out of the ordinary. But as zero hour rolled by, my diligent work was abruptly interrupted. My mother demanded my prescence in the living room and I perfuntorily obeyed. We watched as the events unfolded and our fears, along with those of all Americans, were confronted. Immediantly my mind clicked through the realities of the situation: the Twin Towers just experienced a terrorist attack, the World Trade Center is in New York, my father living and working in New York City, people (he) may have died. My thoughts after that were one rushed blur. The only fortunate news of the day: my father was scheduled to attend a meeting in the World Trade Center on the following Wednesday, not that tramatic Tuesday. Unfortunately, this was not the case with two out of the five partners and friends in his self-owned company. America and my father have never been the same sinced.   </text>
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              <text>I was online with a friend of mine who I grew up with in NJ.  She now lives in NC and I live in Texas.  I was getting ready to take my 5 year old son to see the orthopedic surgeon as he had broken his leg a few days before that (he ended up needing pins).  Anyway, my friend email'd me and asked if I had seen the news and I told her no but that I'd turn it on.  I was amazed!  I had been in the World Trade Center as a little girl in girl scouts.  Still cannot believe they are gone!

God Bless All!
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              <text>Like most people in America, and the world,I watched the events of September 11th unfold on television. I awoke to see the World Trade Center on fire. I knew I wouldn't be going to my job that day. After hearing that the Pentagon had been hit by a plane I had only  one emotion: terror. I really feared for my life, not knowing what would happen next. After watching both towers collapse, I went totally numb.I saw the smoke in the sky from my house, and worse I could smell it. It smelled like death.I had no feelings whatsoever for the rest of the day. I knew life was going to be totally different from now on.

My father is a retired firefighter in the FDNY, and hearing that more than 300 firemen could be dead hit me very hard. I have known firefighters my whole life, and they are among the bravest of the brave. The first estimates of the dead were close to 10,000, and that was a number so incredibly hard to bear. But absolutely nothing could prepare me for the most devastating, shocking news that I was about to get on the night of September 12th.

On the day of the 12th, I rode the Manhattan Bridge over the river from Brooklyn. I saw the smoldering remains of the WTC from the subway, and my first thoughts were that I felt as if I had a couple of old friends. I went to school in the shadow of the WTC, and worked in Greenwich Village since 1984. So seeing those buildings was such a common occurrance for me, that not seeing them was absolutely surreal. It still is.

I still had a nagging feeling that someone I know was lost in those buildings. But I tried not to think about that. But on the night of the 12th, my worst fears were confirmed. I received an e-mail from an old friend of mine who informed me that a dear friend of mine named Joyce Ann Carpeneto was missing in the World Trade Center. I went all numb again. I tried to convince myself that Joyce was fine, in a hospital somewhere and just hadn't gotten word to her family yet. I called my old friend and he told me not to give up hope. I did my best. For the remainder of the week I prayed, lit candles and asked God for a miracle. I still had no word yet by Sunday, so I called my friend back. He told me he had heard nothing. At the moment I knew Joyce didn't make it. The numbness returned again.

Joyce worked on the 83rd floor of the North Tower in a company called General Telecom. None of us are exactly sure why she didn't make it out. There were 4 other firms on that floor, and everyone in those firms made it out of the building alive. All 13 people in General Telecom were killed. None of their remains have ever been found.

One week later a friend of mine sent me the address to a website that Joyce's mom had set up for information about her whereabouts. It contained a stunning picture of Joyce, and the moment I saw it, I broke down and cried for about 2 minutes. It was the hardest I had cried in about 30 years. It was the first time I had let out my emotions since the tragedy unfolded. 

Over the next few weeks, myself and many of Joyce's longtime friends had a brunch, and a Halloween party, both in her memory. They were both bittersweet occasions. I wanted to be around people who knew and loved Joyce. On October 20th I saw Ground Zero for the first time. The devastation was absolutely beyond words. Fortunately I had three friends with me there to lean on. After we viewed the site my friends and I stopped a few blocks away and I read a memorial that I had written in Joyce's memory. My friends were very touched, and one of them I wanted me to e-mail a copy of it to her. I did, and little did I realize, but it hopped all over the Internet. I received dozens of e-mails from people who were so moved by it. I heard from people who didn't even know me, but knew Joyce and saw the tribute I wrote for her.But something even more incredible was about to occur.

On November 25th I went to Ground Zero for the 4th time, this time with a friend of mine named Deborah Burton. It was a very emotional day for the both of us. This was an experience that would be stamped on my brain forever. After this I remember telling Deborah that I had more to write about Joyce, but I didn't know in what form. On New Year's Night, it came out of me, in the form of poetry. I wrote a poem called "There's an Angel Watching Over Us", based on our trip of November 25th. It was just my heartfelt words about that day, and about Joyce. I had no idea the amazing things that were about to happen to me.

One week later I decided that I would leave the poem in my poetry book, and not send it to anyone. A few people would see it and that would be it. Two days later I received an e-mail from poetry.com, about posting poetry on their site. I never received an e-mail from them before but I went to their site, and something told me to post it in their September 11th Dedication Poems section. I did, and entered it in their January poetry contest. I didn't win anything, but I was picked as a semi-finalist in the contest.

I also posted the poem at September11victims.com, in their poems section. After I did, I received an e-mail from a 14-year-old girl in Missouri named Erica Spiess, who asked me for my permission to read my poem in her school's speech contest. I was so touched by it, tears came to my eyes. I said yes, and she also asked me for more information about Joyce, as she wanted to do an introduction about Joyce. Well, she read the poem in May and won a fourth place trophy, and was asked to read it to two 5th grade classes. She said it moved everyone who heard it.I also heard from a 15-year-old girl in upstate New York who read my poem and memorial to her art class, and she also everyone was moved by them.

Also in January I went to a rally at the Park Avenue Armory for the WTC Victims Families. That was a very moving rally, with Mayor Bloomberg and Governor Pataki there. I wore a Mets hat to it with a message for Joyce on the back of it: "Joyce, You Are Forever In My Heart". A photographer from Newsday took a picture of it, and it appeared on page A7 on January 18th. I was so moved by it, and I have a copy of the photo. It is framed and will stay with me forever.

I have received so many touching and moving e-mails about my poem. Dozens of people  from the USA and Canada have told me how beautiful and moving it is. Many people who read it who didn't know Joyce have told me, "I wish I could have known her". One lady from California wrote to me and said, "I'm better for having read your poem" and a man in Toronto told me, "The beauty and warmth of you and your poem help to reming me and make me appreciate the beauty that is inside many people". Hearing things like that has really helped me get throught this horrific experience.

In March a man in Greenwich Village who saw my poem and memorial wrote to me thanking me for helping me "connect" him to Joyce. He also suggested that I send my poem to New York Historical Society. I did, and the curators were so touched by it and my memorial that they will both be a part of an exhibit that will debut in September 2003 called "Unfinished Lives", along with the Mets hat with the message for Joyce.

I have also posted my poem at the mural at the Union Square subway station, at the Ground Zero Memorial, and at Penn Station and Grand Central Station. Any place where people can read it. Right after I posted it at Ground Zero, a man went right over and read it intensely. He then walked over to me, and without saying a word, shook my hand and walked away. I could tell in his eyes he had lost someone, and I was so moved by that touching gesture. 

This has been without question the most incredible experience of my entire life. I never could have imagined something wonderful coming out of such a catastrophic event. I am convinced beyond any doubt that the original e-mail from poetry.com was somehow "directed" to me by Joyce. I believe she wanted the world to see this beautiful poem I had written for her. I also believe that she keeping an eye on all of us who love her. Joyce will forever be Our Angel.  She was one of the sweetest people I have ever known, and I hope I have made her proud with my poem. I did not want her to be just a name on a memorial someplace. She made an impact on everyone who knew her, and I wanted to remind the world that she was here. Her mom said it best on her website: "If you knew her, you had to be her friend. She loves everyone."

And all of us love you Joyce. Forever.

As I conclude this story, I would like to share my poem, "There's an Angel Watching Over Us" with you. I welcome any comments you may have. God bless you all.

John Brian Quinn
Brooklyn, NY
Salesicon@aol.com

"There's an Angel Watching Over Us"

This poem is dedicated to my dear sweet friend Joyce Ann Carpeneto, who will always and forever live in my heart.

It's a gray, overcast day
In late November
The fourth time I've been 
Down this way
The pain in my heart rises
As soon as I walk out
The subway station
But I had to be here for you
I'm not afraid to be here
As I know
There's an Angel watching over us.

Our eyes fill with tears
Pictures line the walls
And the picket fences
Thousands of dreams
Shattered in an instant
A soft rain starts to fall
Could it have been sent
By you?
To show us both
The depth of your love
And the tears still within you
It's an unmistakable sign
There's an Angel watching over us.

Loved ones write their own 
Words of sorrow and grief
On a huge makeshift sheet
I struggle through my tears
To tell you those precious words
I couldn't tell you
When you were here
In this life
Now the rain and the tears
Have left together
And the sun peeks
Through the clouds
Now I am so confident
There's an Angel watching over us.

I've been down this way
Three times before
But this will be the final
Time I come down here
The heartache for me
Is just too great
Seeing that terrible site
Where you left this world
I'd rather remember
The good times we shared
You'll always be
Safe in my heart Sweetie
I'll never break
The Promise I made to you
On the Brooklyn Bridge
You'll always be alive 
In my heart forever
I'll never be afraid to die
Because I'll see you again
One day I know
And because from above
There'a an Angel watching over me.

January 2, 2002

John Brian Quinn
Salesicon@aol.com




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The morning of September 11, 2001 I was at home.
I turned on the news as I ususally do and it was around
8:55 am.  I saw that one of the World Trade Towers was
smoking badly and Diane Sawyer and Charles Gibson were
speculating as to why.  About ten minutes later I saw the
second plane hit the second World Trade tower. Immediately
I thought "this is no fire, this is an attack!"  It seemed
impossible to be watching this.  I felt like I was watching a movie in a theater.  It was unbelieveable.

I spent the rest of the day channel surfing from CNN to the other major news stations.  I called some friends and we 
were all shocked and stunned.   In the days to follow I 
continued to watch this tradgedy and felt so sad at the
loss of so many wonderful people.  I pondered how this
would affect so many families and how they would go on.

I had lost my mom, who was also my best friend, the year
before.  This made my loss greater and I could not even
call mom to talk about this terrible disaster.  However
I was thankful that she died at 86 and did not live to see
this since her generation had already survived Pearl Harbor
and WWII. Dad had died in 1980 and I felt very alone.

My husband, Ken, came home for lunch and we watched
together eager to learn about any survivors but there were
so few.

I had not voted for Pres. Bush but was very amazed and
proud of how he acted, addressed our country and kept
reassuring us that "we will prevail".  I was thankful
that we had him as our leader and that he was not afraid to
say that we were in a battle against evil.  People could
understand this.  I was also proud of our firemen and
policemen and all who came to the aid of strangers in need.

America is criticized so much all around the world and out
of this tragedy I hope the world can see how good Americans
are and America is.  When the chips are down we come
together.  People of all races and religions - united to
fight for our freedom and the freedom of others who
desire it.  

The last year has had its ups and downs.  I do believe that
we will emerge from this as a much stronger and unified
country.  And no matter how long it takes, we will continue
to be thankful we live in a free country, make whatever
sacrifices are necessary and stand fast, with courage
until the world is safe for everyone.

Sincerely,    Joan Kadow Vendlinger/Willowick, Ohio

9-11-2002


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              <text> I witnessed just how fast the US Military does react. I was living on a Army post at the time and was locked down.I felt the pain of the rest of the country but there was little I could do at the time. When we were able to move on and off a bit I went to help out a blood services.I spent the better part of the next few days crying and not really knowing what to expect next. I was didn't want to send my son to school I did. That was my start to going on with my normal life as the president had said to do. I heart still aches for all lost and for those fighting. So many people have become heros and there is know way to thank them all.</text>
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              <text>As a nurse see death all the time. Sept 11 will always be etched in my mind as the the only time I hope to see a masacre of lives. 
I just woke up and turned on the TV watchin CNN and saw Tower one smoking. I stared and thought it was a joke , then During the live picture I saw plane 2 hit tower 2...My heart dropped, and unknown to me a few minutes later both the towers would too..
This day impacted me and more of an impact was Sept 11 , 2002. This is when the terrosist attacks hit home personally. A nurse practioner I worked with oriented me at my new job. We bonded from May 25, 2001 until August 2002. He was a brothe I never had. He was also a reservist and a green baret. Now I feel at a loss and fear. For the 1st time terrosism has hit my heart and soul like many others. Everyday I pray fro him and the 2 kids he left behind for up to 2 years to defend my freedom with is life. 
The twin towers had to collapse in order for us in America to realize we are like the rest of the world, vulnerable to mass violence. This day has taught me to remember , respect and love all those close to me for i will never know when the last time I say to someone "I love you"</text>
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              <text>The Afternoon of September 11th at about 2pm GMT (9am EST):

 I was getting a lift to a Hardware store with my dad because I was painting my bedroom.  As I was waiting to get in the car a squadron of Royal Air Force jets flew low over our house towards the London direction.  We thought nothing of it.

Half way to the Hardware store at 2.29pm GMT, I got a text message from GenieAlert news service sent to my mobile phone saying -

News: Two planes hit towers of New York World Trade center, at least 1,000 injured says CNBC TV/ Reuters.

Me and my dad chatted about it, and assumed it was a small crash, with small planes doing a fly past or something.  I imagined a tiny Cessna doing some promotional flight over new york and hitting the towers.
On our way home we switched on BBC radio 4 and there was no news about it, so we thought it was a fairly minor event.

Back home, the TV was switched off.  I had been home for a while when I mentioned the two planes to my brother, so we put the tv on and all programs on BBC television had been suspended, and replaced with footage of the towers with massive holes in the sides, billowing smoke.
We then heard about the Pentagon, and more reports were comng in about missing flights like the one lost in Pennsylvania.
For a few hours we didn't know what to expect.  We thought that American cities were about to be destroyed one-by-one, and we were also told that a lot of London's financial centres and sky scrapers were being evacuated because of the risk.
Later the Prime Minister appeared on TV declaring an emergency situation - All flights to be re-directed past major cities etc.  All military bases were to be on highest alert.
The news coverage continued on most TV channels, and a lot of programs were pulled off air as a mark of respect.  It was only the next morning when I started to realise what had happened.  What I had seen on tv was real.  We hadn't only witnessed some buildings collapsing, but the lives of thosands of people coming to a barbaric and tragic end.  
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              <text>I wrote the following essay on September 12, 2001.  It helped me to release some of the emotions that I was feeling.  I just sat down and wrote for about 15 minutes, and this is what I had. 

The American Spirit

As I sit here at work, reflecting on the events of the past day, I am reminded of what makes this a great country. It the spirit of the American people. This spirit is the foundation of this nation. This, not the icons of the country is what drives this country. They may destroy these icons, but they cannot destroy this spirit. I too was enraged, sorrowful, and frustrated at this attack. But we will prevail.

As we grieve for the families and friends who have lost loved one's, we must not forget what made this country great. We will be shocked at the violence, cry at the loss of life, and we will bury our dead. But we will not be defeated, we will not stay depressed, we will rise up united as never before since Pearl Harbor and Desert Storm, and we will show the world the American spirit. 

We will return to work, powering the most powerful economy in the world. We will clean up the mess left in the wake of these cowardly attacks. We must reaffirm our liberty and freedom, not giving in to the terror designed to cower us. The memory of those lost deserves at least this. They are not deserving of a legacy or memory of terror and cowardly acts. They should be remembered as the reasons why we stand up for our liberty and fight every attempt to take it away. 

We should erect a monument dedicated to these people following their American dream. They where from all walks of life, Business executives, stock brokers, janitors, police officers, fire fighters, EMTs, tourists, military personnel, and anybody else who was enjoying a trip to one of the symbols of American success. This monument should be new twin towers, not just 110 stories, but 111 stories with the 111th story dedicated to the memory of those lost on September 11, 2001. Not only to those lost, but those who responded to those in need, those who gave blood, waiting in line for hours to get the chance to help. This monument should remind the whole world of the resiliency of the American people, of their spirit. 

Yesterday, I was demoralized, angry, and frustrated. Today I have a renewed sense of urgency to follow my own American dream. To not let these cowardly acts prevent me from achieving and enjoying the rights that the founders of this country found to be self-evident. I will honor the memory of those who were taken from us by picking up, carrying on, and defending my freedoms today and everyday for the rest of my life. This is what I would want my family and friends to do, so that is what I will do. This memory will forever be imprinted upon my memory and will be a constant motivating factor as I pursue my dreams. 

Larry Steven Behnke
September 12, 2001

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              <text>I was in my office hard at work on the 11th and like many other people I experienced the tragedy in a number of ways.  TV, radio, through the stories and frantic anxiety of others and my "commute" home that day.  It all provided an emotional overload.  The tremendous amount of loss and grief and the sheer unfairness and lack of sense of it all contributed to a feeling that I needed to write about it.  What follows is a story, not necessarily of my experiences but of thoughts that were ?and still- go through my head.  
-----------------------------------------------------
Lightning

The alarm sounds and Murphy pulls his boots on and grabs for his hat.  Something about a plane crash at the WTC.  ?How the hell did that happen??  ?Lets Go?.  The fire truck busts out of the station.  The siren screams and the truck weaves through the Manhattan traffic ?nothing new for Engine Co. 54, the pride of midtown.  1st lieutenant Murphy, on the job for 8 years now, looks out at the steady stream of commuters, with their briefcases and pinched up faces ?focused on the daily tasks that wait upon their desks.  Past the reluctant cabbies and bike messengers and the occasional nameless, faceless bum, psycho or addict.  He thinks about the softball game he has scheduled for later that night and the next four days off duty.  About six days of things to do stuffed into the four day down time.  A smile crosses his face as he thinks about walking his daughters, 8, 7 &amp; 4 to school tomorrow and then picking them up for a special lunch at Burger King.  ?What a beautiful day, how do you fly into anything on a day so clear??  ?Murphy, how?d your daughter?s soccer team do last night?? yells Santiago ?one of the few in the company with a longer tenure.  ?Great, we won again? Murphy answers through a big, easy smile that seems to make his bushy fireman?s mustache almost invisible.   The sound of other sirens, police, EMS and other fire companies reel his mind back to the task at hand.  By the sound of it, this is something big.  Everyone in Manhattan is being dispatched downtown.  Smoke billows from one of the towers, now in view.  A stark contrast to the bright blue, cloudless sky.  The sun beats down hotly on the truck as they near.  The mental checklist of equipment and responsibilities complete as Murphy &amp; Co arrive at the scene and jump off the truck.  As they rush towards the entrance ?Santiago is taken?..he is gone.  
Murphy gets a quick, terrible feeling in his gut ?this is wrong?.  Instinct takes over and gets him in the building before he realizes what is raining down from the sky.  The men, though shocked, know they have a job to do.   They split up into groups of 4 and head for different stairwells.  Running a long side other fire fighters, and against a steady stream of horrified office workers, they start their climb. Murphy feels the effects, the vibrations, of what must be a distant explosion.  Nothing on the radio, ?We?ve got to get these people out?.  

Deeply disturbed by what he has just seen, he fights his way upstream with all his gear through the black stairwell.  He realizes there were other heaps outside on the ground and gravity was pulling more.  ?There is death here?. All fires are dangerous but the ones where death have surfaced are the worst -death always wants more.

Murphy thinks about his father, a retired firefighter out of Brooklyn.  The old man would?ve never thought that firefighting in NYC would mean extinguishing flames from a Cessna half a mile up in the air?  Come to think about it, who would have?
Murphy knows that this is a big one, it?ll probably be all over the news and he?ll have some stories to tell back home.  The guys on the softball team love to hear the war stories, like the time he was at the warehouse fire and a falling brick narrowly missed his head and crushed his hand.  He also knows that he is needed here.   His training and physical conditioning will make the difference between someone upstairs living or dying?..   ?got to get there?  ??  ?Santiago?  ?..  ?What kind of hell must it be for people to launch themselves from 100 up??  ?. ?keep climbing?  ?Life for Murphy is moving fast now yet the anticipation of the unknown seems to have suspended time.  Murphy?s mind drifts for a moment as he times his heartbeat to one for every 3 stairs.  Even so, he knows that he is now on floor 42.  He thinks about Santiago?s rocking chair at the firehouse and his spot at the dinner table.  Murphy notices that there are no longer people going down the stairs   ?good, they should all be out of harms -WOW! A very deep, muffled rumble takes hold ?it shakes the building and stops Murphy for the first time.  The 3 other firefighters stop with him.  They hold on and listen through their fast, deep breathing.  The shaking and rumbling subside.  The 6? 5? black firefighter, known as Frenchy back at the firehouse for his love of French Fries, suggests that a ?transformer musta blown above?.  The other 3 mumble or grunt in agreement, almost trying to convince themselves.  Murphy goes for his radio but it is still overwhelmed with static and broken, choppy transmissions ?been that way since they entered the stairs.  He hears ?it fell? but that?s all he can make out.  Just more incoherent noise.  They continue their ascent towards the sky.   ?There is death here? thinks Murphy again, ?BE CAREFUL?.  At floor 77 Murphy is physically exhausted but mentally firing on all cylinders?he continues.  At 91 he smells the burn for the first time and gets a kick of adrenaline that could make him rip one of the stairwell doors off of its hinges. 

At 92 another rumbling stops them again.  This one is different, not as violent as before?but it seems to be growing?.  Suddenly, it opens up ?it?s everywhere. Upside down, backwards, inside out.  His flashlight is useless, Murphy doesn?t even know if it?s still in his hands.  He covers up and grabs onto?something?he?s falling, twisting like a bug in a tornado??.Murphy knows he is dying.  In an instant, like a crack of lightning, he sees the faces of his beautiful children.  He sees their smiles and, oddly, he sees there voices.  His heart breaks?.His wife ?he misses her.  They have built so much together.  He hopes she knows the love he has for her.  His mother, his brother and sister, his friends.  How can he go on without them     -or them without him?.his kids?. 
The instant is up, 
the lightning is gone.   
darkness?
quiet..
nothing.
 
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              <text>During second hour, we were watching the movie"The Patriot", and all of the sudden a teacher comes rushing through the doors and yells out to my teacher that the twin towers had been hit by a plaane. At that very second, my teacher ran to the t.v. and turned to CNN, and we saw the fire, and then a few minutes later we saw another plane hit the twin towers. about ten minutes later the phones were ringing off the hook, and it was a lot of the parents taking the students out of school early, then the phone rang for the seventh time and it was my ma, picking me and my sister up from school.</text>
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              <text>I remember Sept11 very well i was still in bed it was my 25th birthday and my husband came running in the room saying get up get up...you have to come see this i asked him what it was he said a plane had just crashed threw one of the twin towers,i said stopp messing around it's my birthday,im tring to relax,he said baby i am not kidding a plane had just crashed threw the tower..i jumped up and ran into living room as i approached the tv another plane was hitting the second tower .......it was the most devastating exsperience of my life..and then when the pentagon was hit and the plane went down in Pa i knew it was a teror attack and i just couldnt believe what was happening..i quickly called my mom because she lives right across the river in NJ
and she said she could see lots of smoke and the air smelled really bad....i was scared that more were coming and my step father worked at the power plant there in NJ so i was terrified that there would be more attacks,and his work would be a target as well.I sat in front of that tv all day and night into early hrs the next morning.Today i turned 27 and my birthdays are never the same.i feel theres nothing to be happy about on this day,and for many never will be til we get that SOB bin laden............
God Bless America..................No one can take us down.</text>
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              <text>My friend who calls himself HATS, was working at ground Zero immediately after the terror attacks.  He wrote me that he was upset about all the movie stars and famous singers and generally curious public that was standing in the wings, watching him and the rest of his men, posing for pictures and giving out interviews.  I wrote this for him and for the men and women working tiredlessly, day after day, at GROUND ZERO.

to hats


to look at it
a huge still smoldering tangle
of twisted metal
concrete
and smoke
one cannot yet see the beauty within it
the resting place of nearly 5000 souls

the resting place of dreams
hopes and fears
love lost
fortunes destroyed
tears shed
bodies torn apart
and still
a place where hope is alive

the hope that we
as human beings
can learn to love again
learn to trust again
learn to crawl out of the ashes
and still the flames of hatred

the hope that love never dies
that memories will never take the backseat
to apathy 
the hope that hope itself
trusting in itself
will somehow be enough
for tomorrow

and yes my friend
as movie stars traipse
and tourists gaggle
and onlookers disturb you
please remember
that todays stars may actually make a difference
tomorrow
if their art
their acting
their writing
their singing
takes an upward turn 
after viewing 
Americas graveyard
and they start saying no!!!
to just making the buck
and spend some time
spreading the message
of Love.

with love to all of you

M
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