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              <text>Being in Australia, it was late at night when the news first broke. MUm and I were watching the TV and the news of the first plane hitting scrolled across the bottom of the screen. At first we thought it was an accident. A few minutes later we knew it wasn't because the news of the second plane hitting came through. Every channel went to cover what was happening. We watched for a few hours before mum went to bed, she just could watch it anymore. I don't know why I stayed up.

I watched it all night until I had to go to work. I cried the whole night. After years of seeing disaster movies you'd think we'd all be used to images like these but there's something very horrifying about knowing they are real people and they really are dying. But the most heart wrenching moment wasn't seeing the planes go in, or seeing the people jump from the building with no hope of reaching the ground safely. The most emotive image was that of a woman standing in the middle of the street covered in dust and smoke, crying for her friends and maybe relatives who were still in the WTC buildings.

I was working at a primary school teaching year two as part of my teaching degree. I got to school having had no sleep and had to discuss with the other teachers what we were going to tell the children, if we were going to make a whole lesson of it or just let them ask whatever they needed to in their own time.

The teacher whose class I was on and I decided we'd just have a bit of a discussion with the class, nothing too heavy, after all they were only seven years old. Then we gave them a few minutes to draw or write what they felt, or they could come and ask us questions. One boy's parents knew someone who worked in one of the towers but he didn't really grasp the enormity of the situation, he drew a really good picture though.

Later that day we had an assembly because it was Education Week and the classes were all putting on performances for the parents. The principal made a nice speech and we had a minutes silence.

We've had our own tragedies since then, with the events in Bali bringing the threat of terrorism very close to home, but we will never forget the tragedy of September 11 as that was our wake-up call.

It is up to us, as a global community to come together to stand up to these cowards who seek to destroy what is different from themselves. We should strive to make the world a place of understanding and acceptance, no matter what a persons race, religious beliefs or background. We are all one race, the human race. We should embrace diversity within our countries and within our communities. We need to teach ourselves about different cultures because ignorance breeds fear and fear breeds intolerance.

It doesn't matter who you are, what you do, or why you do it. If you can say that you've tried your best to accept people for who they are rather than the preconceptions you may have about them or their background, then you can be proud of yourself because it takes intelligence to see through the preconceptions.

Let every day be a reminder of the greatness of the diversity we enjoy in being part of this global community and that no matter how many attacks we survive, no matter how many wars we fight, no persons is worth as much dead as alive.

Make every day the best it can be by doing some good deed, whether it's opening the door for someone with their hands full or saving someones life.

Cherish every day as if it's your last and tell your partner you love them, make peace with your family, or do something you might never do otherwise.</text>
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              <text>On the morning of September 11, 2001, I was at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago, Illinois, where my daughter Catherine had undergone two open heart surgeries a week and two weeks earlier.  She was asleep and I was sitting next to her bed watching a morning news program on the TV.  The program was interrupted to show the result of the first plane hitting the tower.  It was shocking, but no one seemed to be thinking it was an attack.  It wasn't long, maybe 20 or 30 minutes, when the second plane smashed into the other tower.  Then it became evident this was no accident.  The imploding of the two towers was unimaginable.  I was riveted to the TV for the rest of the day and the subsequent days. I will always associate the two events, my daughter's heart surgeries and the 9-11 terrorist attacks.  </text>
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              <text>I was on the treadmill that morning like every other. It was very early West coast time. I had the TV on CNN. My wife was asleep and I was not really concentating on the TV until I saw the burning buildings. I was shocked and scared. I got sick to my stomach and went on to watch the coverage non-stop. I could not get the images of people jumping  out of my head. To this day I think of them and it pains me still. I have nightmares about what it must have been like for the people trapped.And I can't help but dream of myself being trapped and having to jump out of the windows. It is one of the most horrendous things I have ever seen. I will never forget.</text>
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              <text>I was at work and watching Good Morning America as I usually do in the early morning hours.  I will always remember that moment and as with many, the symbol of 9-1-1 will forever be more than just a symbol for help but also a sign of lasting American Pride for all of those innocent men, women and children who gave their all.
God Bless our President and God Bless our country.
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Panama City Florida</text>
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              <text>It was the second Tuesday of my senior year of high school, and it wasn't until the very end of first period, US Gov't class, that the principal made an annoucement that the World Trade Centers - both of them - had been hit by airplanes, and the Pentagon (only a few miles northeast of us) had been hit as well.

What the heck did you say to that?  I was surprised to find that I could feel my mind rejecting what the principal had said; part of me simply refused to believe it.  And the idea that it was an attack?  No; it had to be coincidence.

No, it couldn't be coincidence.

Cold reality hit me when I looked into a classroom with a TV to see the burning towers.  They replayed the footage of the second tower being hit.  Again, and again; it couldn't be an accident; that plane meant to hit the WTC.

22 minutes later, while I was sitting in my Geoscience classroom with my eyes glued to the TV like everyone else's, I watched the second WTC tower fall.

I will never, ever, for the rest of my days, forget what the CNN reporter said.  "Oh my god," he gasped, voice dry and horrified.  "There are no words."

There are no words.

I was watching people die, and I burst into tears at the knowledge, drawing the eyes of the entire classroom.  How could they not be crying?  They just saw 1500 people die!  We were all in shock.

What more is there to say?  I went home early that day and watched TV and commiserated with friends online.  It's burned on my memory as if branded.  And so it shall always be.</text>
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              <text>Since I work from home, I had gotten up as usual and turned on the computer and then the TV.  It was 9:00 in the morning.  Of course, the news of the first plane hitting the North Tower was on every channel and, since New York City is one of my favorite places, I was glued to the television.  I then watched as the second plane hit and the enormity of what was happening filled me with the greatest fear I've ever known.  I was, at the time, 9 months pregnant and my emotions were uncontrollable.  I was unable to wrap my mind around what was happening.  I frantically tried to reach my husband and when I finally reached him, he didn't believe what I was telling him...that our world had gone crazy and was literally falling apart.  Then, as I described to him what I was seeing on the television, the first tower fell.  I fell to the ground in disbelief and despair.  

It's difficult to recall specifically what I did that day...I remember the feelings far better than the details.  My initial fear and disbelief evolved into anger and the deepest grief for our country and the thousands of people who lost their lives while simply going about their daily business.  I was also terrified for my unborn child...I didn't want to bring my child into a world in such chaos, a world where I could not protect him from evil.  The intensity of emotion and grief is indescribable.

Twenty-three days later, I gave birth to my son, Roman Joseph.  What great joy in such a terrible time!  I felt it drew me even closer to those who lost fathers, mothers and children.  Now as a mother, I feel more empathy than ever before in my life.  My feelings and emotions are raw and true.

It is now September 11, 2002.  A year has passed and a lifetime.  The feelings I experienced one year ago are the same today as then.  It is still hard to wrap my mind around this event.  It is unbelievable yet brutally real.  I believe in the strength of America.  I know that we will survive but I don't think we will ever truly recover.</text>
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              <text>My story is not that of a hero or anything like that.  Just of an ordinary person that was shocked awake by the horror of the acts of a few cowards.  
My boyfriend and I were sitting in the living room of the house that we share together with my two children and my grandaughter.  The TV was on to the morning talk show that we normally watch, to get the just of the day, when we were in awe of the second plane flying straight into the second tower of the Trade Center.  I am from NJ by birth so I remember when the buildings were put up.  What an awesome sight they were, pristene and new. Now they were on fire and on the verge of collapse.  Like the reporter said of the Hindenburg,  "OH THE HUMANITY"  I sat in shock and disbelief.  My brain could not comprehend what it was seeing. My ears could not believe what they were hearing.  I work for the government, like probably half of the town, in one way or another.  I called my job and they were in the process of evacuation of the base, only active duty personnel the rest of us were not allowed on the base.  I was concerned for the folks that I work with as well as for the rest of the world let alone the rest of the country.  Those poor people didn't have any idea what fate awaited them or their loved ones left behind.  After the phone call to one of my co-workers, the rest of the day is much of a blur.  You cant see much when your eyes are filled with tears for people that you dont even know.  And your head pounds from the thunder between your ears because from the rush of images of towering infernos.  I love my country and my fellow man.  I hope that we find the cowards that are responsible for this tragidy of life.  My grandaughter will not know how it feels to not worry about someone knocking down your place of work, and taking you on a one-way trip to oblivion.  God Bless the Heros, and the USA.        </text>
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              <text>  I work nights and at the time I was working at Arkansas Children's Hospital in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. I came home from work and went straight to bed, only to have my husband come in around 11:00 A.M. and wake me to tell me to turn on the news because the World Trade Centers had been hit by airplanes. Disbelief hit me. I though surely he was mistaken, he gets things all mixed up sometimes. How could this happen? I sat in my bed for the rest of the morning watching the coverage of what the day had entailed. Horror, fear, and mostly anger cut through me. How dare soemone do this to OUR country. Tears of sorrow and anger seemed to take over. I prayed for the ones lost that day, I prayed for New York, I prayed for the people who were wondering if their loved ones were alive and I prayed for our country.  
   Later that afternoon I had to get ready for work, the TV was never turned off. I listened for any kind of news as I got ready for work. I listened to the radio on my hour long commute to work. After I got to work, took report (I am a registered nurse) we kept the TVs on and watch all night during the 12 hour shift. All of us wondering what can we do to help. I knew I was going to get the flag my husband and I always wanted for our house. But that didn't feel like I was doing enough. I still feel like I haven't done enough. Since 9-11-01 I felt more patriotic than ever, I am so proud to be an American.</text>
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              <text>I was in my 5th grade classroom at Bayard Elementary School.  The students were at Music class at the time.  I was called to a fellow teacher's classroom to watch the unblieveable events unfolding in New York.  Her classroom was the only one of 10 fifth grade classrooms to have cable TV.  I immediately called my wife, who was at home, to tell her what was happening.  As much as I was needed at school, I really felt a strong pull to be at home with my family.  

I went down to get the kids from Music class as they were going to be with me for the remainder of the day, as we are a self-contained classroom.  I debated with myself as to whether I should tell the kids what was happening only 2 hours away from us to the north and to the south.  I decided to tell them that only a plane crashed into the World Trade Center.  Until school was over, we heard nothing else in our classroom.  It was hard to teach Math and Science when my mind was elsewhere.  I hurried home after school.

This was my first full year in teaching.  I am a retired police officer and firefighter from Ohio.  I felt such a sense of extreme loss for the firefighters and police officers.  Although I personally knew no one killed on September 11th, I understand what it takes to face danger when everyone else runs away from it.  They were all heroes.  

My wife and I spent our honeymoon at the Marriott at the World Trade Center.  She had contractions when we went to the top of the WTC when she was 5 months pregnant with our daughter, Amanda.  My father-in-law flew us in his plane up the Hudson River, well below the WTC soaring heights.  I reflected on these times as well as times when I risked my life to help others in my previous career.  
    
On September 12th I decided to have a discussion with the kids in my room.  We closed the door and talked about their thoughts and feelings.  It brought us closer together as a class.  I felt it was my duty to explain and talk about the things that happened the previous day.  I think parents defer to the teacher to explain things to kids that they may have difficuly talking about.  My job was to make sure that the kids knew they were safe with me...to reassure them.  

Since September 11th, my family and I have travelled to Ground Zero as a pilgimage and out of respect of all those who died.  It is hallowed ground.  We were moved by the messages left by people who came like we did.  The things we had taken for granted are no longer unappreciated.  Freedom has meant so much more to me in the last year.  We live in the greatest country in the world.  God bless America! </text>
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              <text>It was early morning. It started out the same as always. My friend Heather and I had a sleep over at my house. Her mom went out of town and she planned to stay until Wednesday. Well, we woke up and got dressed for school. We did everything normal. We got on the bus. We ate breakfast at school. Then sat down and waited for the first bell to ring. It was happening right then, but we wouldn't know until about 9:00am. We are in the same time zone as New York so it was about 9:00am eastern time. We were all in 3rd period cutting up and having out fun, I was talking to my friends and some boys in my English class. Right when the bell rang we hurried out of the room because it was out bathroom break. People in the girls bathroom for 3rd period reading we like in tears. They were all shaking and crying really hard. We all were just freaked out with this. The Mexicans were crying. The African Amercian kids were crying. Whites, Oranges, Black, Mixes. They were all holding each other. We were very scared! The 3rd period reading class had gone to the library that day. Mrs. Jeffers, the librarian, kept the televison on to listen to the news when she was checking out books. Two boys were watching the televison instead of reading like they were suppost to do. They started yelling for the teacher and Mrs.Jeffers to get over there quickly. At first the boys thought it was a movie, but when they saw the reporters down on ground zero getting hit by smoke from the hit buildings they knew it was no acting. Everyone gathered around the televison set. It was so weird. Most of us had no clue what twin towers were until that day. We all thought it was something stupid. Like an airplane made a mistake and crashed into a building. We weren't really afraid till about the end of the day. When finally the teachers were brave enough to tell us what the heck had happened. You have never heard so many rumors. People were saying that a fifth plane was still flying around and was going to try to hit at different places. Of course, every state was saying they were next because something good about their state that the terrorist would want to distory. Well, in Georgia it was about Atlanta. Atlanta has one of the largest airports in America and people were thinking that plane was coming from Atlanta and was going to crash around the boarders of Georgia or in Atlanta or go down south to the oceans. It wasn't true. All the planes had already crashed and no one else was in one because no airplane was aloud to fly by that time in the day. There was a huge rumor that they had crashed into the White House and it was completely distroyed. When I came home with Heather that night I was afraid, but I was hiding it. We both numbed ourselves out and finsished our homework and then played Mario on the old nintendo. My sister-in-law had told us the ins and outs of what had happened because she was at home all day. What I thought was weird was it was raining and sad looking by the time we got home. I think God was crying from all the hate and was exreamlly sad that he had to take so many lives. As much as I hate wanting to die, I kinda wished that could have had peaceful death that night and not have to go through the pain of the next days and the following weeks. I couldn't sleep all night. Neither Heather. We both slept in my mother's bed. It was so quiet the next morning all though ever sound we heard made us jump. Every morning we were used to the sound of an airplane from the base in Savannah and now all we heard was a man using a tractor to plant his crops. I think we should have been allowed to stay home because it was way too scary to go back to school since the attack had been made at a school. It got better after that. A little better each day. It was an awful day, but I believe it was a wake up call. To show us there is evil in this world and we have to fight the evil.</text>
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              <text>That day will live in all our lifes and maney more lifes to come. That day I was sitting at my desk listing to the radio and doing my work. Then the tragdey begane. We all sat in disbilfe. One of our co-worker went home to get a tv so we could see what was going on. We took that whole day and watch and prayed for all those who would be finding out they lost their loved ones. I cried maney nights. My heart was torn. I could not bare the fact of losing my child or my husband. But so many did that day, and that makes me feel selfish. 

To all those who were lost and there Families.
You will forever be in our hearts

                        Jeff,Kelly,
                        Tyler,Trevor,Mackenzie &amp; Dana</text>
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              <text>September 11th 2001..Started off like any other day. I went to work in Bayridge. A co-worker came in and she had a horrified look on her face. I asked her what was wrong..she told me a plane had just hit the World Trade center. I though oh my god..what a horrible accident! I turned on the TV and watched, as much of the nation did. When the second plane hit I knew we were under attack. I called my father who works in downtown Manhatten and I started to cry. I couldn't believe this was happening. From there on it had just got worse. I heard that there were other hijacked planes and then the pentagon was hit. It was all so sureal. It felt like a nightmare. I then tried to reach my husband because I knew that he was going to be leaving. He is in the Air Force I knew that we were a country at war and he would be needed to defend our freedom. I couldnt stop crying. I just wanted to be home with my family and cherish them. My heart ached for those who were on the planes and on the floors where the planes had hit. Then the towers fell...our city would never be the same. So many innocent people died that day. The fire fighters who rushed in to the burning towers try to save lives and the police who tried to help also. They are true heros. I will never forget the feeling I had that day and I will never forget the men and women who died so tragically. The cowards who did this will pay and we will rebuild. They can never take our spirit and freedom will prevail. God Bless the victims and their families. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!! We will never forget.</text>
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              <text>It's been almost a year now, but this is the sortof of thing that never leaves you.  I wrote this up the day after, trying to get everything down before I forgot.

This is mostly a stream on conscious, since I was really trying to get as much out as I could, and still was a bit shell shocked afterwards.

I went to what I figured was a usual day of work visiting my client, up on the 37th floor of the WFC. I was talking with one of the staff when I heard a boom and noticed some rippling in the shadows off the WTC. I looked up and saw a huge gash in the tower and fire pouring out and immediately thought a plane had crashed. With that I grabbing my bag and headed to the stairwell.

The stairwell was a crowded madhouse, with people acting with no regard to it being a serious occasion.  I was pretty worried at that point though, since I had a sickenign hunch it was a terrorist incident, probally cause I am a bit of a pessimist.

The people from the department and I managed to get to the ground floor, but just as we exited the building, the second plane flew right over us and crashed into the building. I saw everything, and it was just luck that I was on that side, and not the other where the flames came out. However, a ton of debris came out the back too. 

It was sheer pandemonium then.  So much for everybody staying calm. Someone behind me ran into me so hard I was shoved to the ground, cutting open my knuckles as I hit the ground. As I got up, something charred hit the ground about five feet away from me. It was human sized and smelled like burnt meat. I did not stick around to look, since at that momment I figured I had better keep moving and got up and got out of there, turning to a side loading door for shelter from the falling objects.

Strangely enough, I managed to find one of the people in the department who was stuck there having an asthma attack and paralyzed with fear. I knew I could not just leave her there, especially since in the streets it was everyone for themselves. I figured that if we got to the water we should be relatively safe from any flames, at least there would be something to jump into if it came to that. So I grabbed her arm and led her to the water.

The rest of the department found us, and I stopped walking her once we got to the water. With everyone accounted for, I figured I should find a phone so I could call my Mom and my office to tell them I was still in one piece. With the chaos occuring, all lines were dead, and with me not owning a cell phone, I was out of luck.  I returned to the department group, mainly cause I didn't know anyone else and wanting to look after them. On returning, I suggested to the department that we try to find which direction we should start moving away from the building to.  This area was still too close to the buildings, and I warned them that they were in a huge risk of falling down.  So he and myself went off looking for the best way to go, me still mindful of trying to find a working phone.

I finally found a phone, in a bar of all places. The Department Head said he would wait for me outside while I called. 

I was not able to get in touch with home but I did manage to call work and told them to please pass a message on to my Mom that I was all right. I then exited the bar....

To find I was ditched by the Department Head and on my own. Just then I heard a creaking noise and screaming that building was collapsing. After cursing to myself for being for stupid cause I was so trusting, I started quickly moving to Battery Park, but could not out run the dust storm that spread out in the area. I wore loafers that day, and they are not the best type of shoe to be running in.

Ever see pictures of Mount Saint Helens erupting? That's what the cloud was like. Totally blinding with raining dust and ash.

Kept walking, jumping over ledges to get further along.  I may not be a fast runner, but I can walk very fast.  Probally best that I did not run, since with all the dust, I would have slipped onto the concrete.  Eventually I stopped, held my breath, and converted my buttoned down shirt to a makeshift breathing mask.

The air cleared and the sun came out again. I found I was by the water still in a corner area where a bunch of other people had ended up. I think the area is where the boathouse is, but not being familar with this place (I only visted the WFC and WTC cause of work and never went outside). I must thank the policemen and policewomen here, they were really doing a great job keeping people calm and handing out breathing masks. Unfortunately I never got one cause some jerk snatched the one I had in my hand and ran away.

Well then the second building falls. This time I was ready. I put my make shift mask back on, got down on the ground, and remembering a portable umbrella I had with me, opened it up and covered my head. This one was not as bad, it went in the opposite direction mostly (which actually was the area my brother was in at the time. He managed to out run it by heading into Greenwich Village and maneuvering through alleys).

Eventually a bunch of boats, from tug boats to ferries and even sail boats, came to the railing. In a quick and organized way, everybody got onto the boats. I managed to get on one of the ferries, which brought me to Jersey City.

Which was another area I was not familar with.

Well I wandered around there for a while not sure what to do. I first tried to go to the Pavonia/Newport PATH station, since people mentioned it was still wokring.  This was closed, so I had to think fo what next to do.

Eventually I went to one of the hotels, just to clean myself from the dust and ash. I just did a quick cleaning, mainly for my face, shirt and hair.  With that accomplished, I left the bathroom and looked around the hotel lobby. 

With no other plce to go, I decided to stay put there to try to figure out my next move.  I first tried to get a room, but they were all booked up.  I decided to do the next best thing then and rest int he lobby so I could calm down a bit.  I also got some food, since I figured I would need some energy, as well as a beer to calm me down a bit.

After eating, I figured that maybe I should try to call home again.  Since I know was in New Jersey, I may have a bigger chance of getting through.  After a few failed attempted, I did manage to finally contact home.  My borther had made it out of the area alright as well, and my Mom did not have a heart attack when she heard the news, which was actually my biggest worry that entire time.

I only stayed on the phone for a small amount of time.  There people behind me, and I knew they needed to contact people as well.  Plus I wanted to try to get out of there and back home asap. I went back to the desk to inquire if they knew if any cabs were running still. None were, however the hotel was trying to set up a limo service to get people to their homes.  I waited arround a bit more, to fidn out no car service was going to the area of my toen, but the trains westward from Hoboken were running again.  This meant a way home. It also meant I had to walk to Hoboken.

It was extremely creepy taking that walk.  I was literally the only person walking on the sidewalk or the side of the street in broad daylight on a sunny day.  The plumed cloud from the site of the blast zone across the river added to the unsetteling situation. 

After a half an hour walk I arrived at Hoboken and found a train on my route. But once inside the train it was evacuated cause of a bomb scare. Everybody was quickly evacuated, and luckily it was just a false alarm. We climbed back in and the train left, bringing me back to my town. I walked from the station to my house a few blocks away and finally collapsed once inside the front door.

I was one of the lucky ones. I managed to get out of their with some messed up lungs and a scared hand. My lungs cleared up in a month, which was rather surprising to the doctor. </text>
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              <text>I was on leave due to pregnancy (my son was born 12/16/01), and I got up early that morning, ambled to my computer, and read on Yahoo news that a plane had hit the WTC.  Wow, must have been someone drunk, I thought, as I went back to bed.

An hour or so later I got back on the Internet and went to he-man.org, to the bulletin boards.  There were lots of posts saying "Turn it on CNN," etc.  So I did--and what I saw was to me beyond belief.  Apparently the second plane had just hit.

I was in complete shock.  I remember thinking, how dare they?  Who did they think they were?

The day was surreal.  People on listservs and people who regularly posted to certain boards were more or less taking headcounts, making sure everyone was okay.  A friend of mine in Virginia told me via AIM that everything there was in lockdown.  I talked to my mother via AIM (she lives in my hometown of Detroit) and she told me that the Renaissance Center in downtown Detroit had been evacuated, as had the Sears Tower in Chicago.

I talked with friends in the UK and Austria and let them know I was all right; I lived about a thousand miles away from it all.  I think my mother was on the phone with friends in Australia.

People who regularly posted to FARK.com (a site where news links are posted and people comment on them) were posting away as events unfolded.

I don't think I'll forget this day any time soon.</text>
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              <text>        When I first heard about the World Trade Center I was shocked when they got hit.I stared crying when I heard about it. Now when it is September 11, I will never forget about it.I felt sad abou the people who died in the Trade Center.I wish it would of never happend at all.I also did not want the people who lots there ture loveto die.Because it is sad to them when September 11, comes.I also want them to fell better but I dom't want them to for get all about.GOD BLESS U.S.A.



                                  by, Michelle Nolan</text>
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              <text>      I was at school between homeroom and 1st period, when
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              <text> My mom picked me up at 7:30 AM Central time.  We were going to finish last minute details for my wedding, Oct. 13th.  We had to pick up plane tickets for some family members from out of town and pick up my dress, etc...  i wanted to stop by my parents house to sat hi to my dad before we started.  He opened the front door with a stragne look on his face and said "A second plane just hit the World Trade Center." My mom and I were confused and thought he had misunderstood what they had said on TV.  When I finally was told what was going on I got on the phone with my mother-in-law to see if her cousin had made it home from NY yet.  She flew out and arrived home at 1AM. she had been to the WTC the day before.  While on the phone I heard my dad say " What is that, oh my god they've hit the pentagon."  I will always remember this day as the only day I have ever seen my dad show fear!!  I canceled all of my plans for the day and I called, my then husband to be, and asked him if he had heard,  he said they were all huddled around a radio in the press room listening and no one could get a hold of anyone else to see what it was really like.  I couldn't even describe to him what it was like.  We spent that night watching the TV trying to make it make sense.  We still can't make it a year later.  Then we did the candle light vigial with some people at work, we will be making that a yearly tradition as our family grows!!!!!

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                  <text>September 11 Digital Archive Stories</text>
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                  <text>This collection is the bulk of the archive, representing the reactions and experiences of thousands of individuals beginning in 2002. </text>
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              <text>Ground Zero Through My Eyes. 

By Bill Donovan
Devoted Husband, Father, Friend 

9/11/01

Day One

    Working at the Bowery Bay W.P.C.P. a sewage treatment plant in Queens, I was standing on the deck of the primary tanks and one of my guys informed me of what had happened. I looked over and saw one of the Twin Towers on fire, I couldn?t believe it. I turned to the guys and said they?ll never take down these buildings. A few minutes later the second plane hit, I stood in shock, watched in horror. Then the anger set in. I couldn?t believe what was happening, the disregard for human life. Watching as both buildings burned I saw a cloud behind Tower #1 and when the smoke cleared Tower #2 was gone. Disbelief! This couldn?t be happening. It was like being in a dream in broad daylight, everything seemed to move in slow motion now. A short time later Tower 1 was gone. Then the sorrow set in, all those people. I thought to myself what can I do? How can I help? I drove home with such an empty feeling. As I was driving down the Long Island Expressway there were times when I didn?t know where I was, being in a daze most of the time. When I got home I was still in a daze thinking all the time I have to get down there, I have to do something.

9/12/01

Day Two

    I drove down the Long Island Expressway towards Manhattan and when I reached Queens the Police and State Troopers had closed all lanes into the city except for the left lane, this was used for emergency personnel and vehicles. I jumped into this lane and at each checkpoint I showed my Environmental Protection ID and was allowed to pass. As I approached the midtown tunnel the police were pulling over vans and trucks to be searched. It started to get a little scary not knowing what to expect. After going through the midtown tunnel and into Manhattan at 34th street it seemed as if nothing had happened, the hustle and bustle seemed the same as always, New York City on a typical day. As I drove down 2nd Ave. I could see the smoke rising from the Trade Center and my mouth went dry. I cut over to Broadway and down towards Lower Manhattan, every road was closed down and barricaded from canal street down to Battery Park, 5 to 10 Police Officers on every corner.  At each checkpoint I showed my ID and was allowed to pass. After passing Canal street an eerie quiet and still greeted me, no more hustle and bustle there was no one, no movement, just no one. The sun was blocked out from the dense smoke and a gray brown haze covered Lower Manhattan. Everything was covered with dust and ash, the dust on the street coming up in clouds from the tires as I drove. 

   I parked my car near Pace University across from The NYC Downtown Hospital, there were about 25 Doctors and Nurses outside with gurneys and stretchers anxiously waiting for the survivors to arrive. As I walked down towards ground zero from the Hospital I could not believe what I was seeing. The dust and ash on the street was about 4 to 12 inches deep and kicked up in clouds as I walked, the debris went on in a 10 block area and more, crushed cars, trucks, burned out busses and fire engines every where I looked. Thick smoke was rising from the ruins of the buildings, steel from the World Trade Center pierced through vehicles 5 blocks away, paper from offices everywhere, and floating down from above. 

   Nothing could have prepared me for what I was witnessing. As I got closer to the center of this devastation the knot in my stomach got bigger, knees a little weaker, there were Fireman and civilians coming from ground zero covered in concrete dust and ash, with blank stares, tears and frustration on the faces of most. I could taste the smoke and dust, the closer I got the thicker it became. 

    Reaching the plaza area I didn?t know what to do, people were everywhere, how could I help? A gray haze made it hard to see, there was smoke and dust everywhere. There were Firefighters resting on the curbs just across from the plaza, nurses and volunteers handing out dust masks and water,. One of the Firefighters looked at me and for a minute I didn?t recognize him he was covered with ashes and dust, it was Skip, we had worked together at the plant, we shook hands and hugged each other, it was hard to talk, what can you say except I'm sorry and it?s a terrible thing. He had lost so many brothers and friends. I told him I had to get in there and we said goodbye. 

   I felt an inner strength and determination to get in there and help my fellow New Yorkers and Americans. As I started to go into the crater the knot in my stomach loosened up and I went to work. Working with Firefighters and Search and Rescue teams we dug holes through the debris trying to get deeper into and under this mountain of steel and concrete. Everything that came out of the holes was handed up to lines of volunteers who then passed it down the line to the street. Ironworkers with torches cut away reinforcement bars and steel I beams that blocked our way, it was a slow process. I felt a sorrow so deep in my heart as we carried out the dead.  Then as cheers erupted when someone was found alive you were uplifted and thought there is still hope. We worked shoulder-to-shoulder removing steel and debris by hand and bucket  for hours on end. 
  
   Standing on the rim of this crater all you could see was devastation. Buildings sheared in half, huge pieces of floors hanging off the broken buildings ready to fall, smoke billowing out from everywhere. People searching in all corners. Up in the buildings with their front walls missing, you could see firemen and volunteers searching through the upper floors for survivors. The surrounding buildings with all the windows broken. 

You could see America.

    Working in the crater that was once the World Trade Center I saw a firefighter carrying an American Flag climbing towards a part of the antenna that stood at the top of Tower #1. This flag must have come from an office in one of the buildings. As I stood watching, like a scene from the sands of Iwo Jima a group of firefighters holding their brother as far up the pole as possible placed this flag on the antenna. I heard in the distance the Battalion Chief yell hand salute and everyone inside and outside the crater (about three hundred) stopped and saluted. An eerie quite came over all of us, after about 2 minutes the man standing next to me yelled God Bless America. It felt good to be an American.

All of us cried. 

    Reaching out a hand to the fireman as they came out of holes we had dug under the iron, I could see them in tears; the sadness on their faces was almost unbearable, the silence in them said it all. It had been almost 8 hrs since we found any survivors. The body of one fireman wrapped in an American Flag as we passed him down through the line, everyone was silent. 

    Three horns everyone out, building #5 has shifted 6 degrees and may come down. A scramble to get out of the crater, hundreds of men and women trying to get to safety, fear on the faces of all as we run out of the crater and off the plaza level down to the street. After the all clear we come back to the crater, the same faces. Hrs later three horns everyone out, part of building #7 is coming down, same drill same faces. 

    
   While taking a break I had time to reflect, we had worked for almost 15 hrs straight and had not pulled anyone out alive since about 8:30am, remembering the Doctors and Nurses waiting at the hospital sent a chill through me, they had waited and no one came. 

    Sitting on the curb around midnight in front of the plaza area, Red Cross workers and Nurses walked down the lines of exhausted volunteers passing out water, food, gloves, hardhats and kindness. The people next to you were next to you most of the day and night, you got to know their names Mike, George, Tony, Al, Jeremy and so many more, all working toward one goal find someone alive. I have lived in New York my whole life and never saw such unity or empathy for fellow New Yorkers and fellow Americans. 

   I need some rest. I get to my car and try to get some sleep but the thought of one of these buildings coming down keeps running through my head. The thought of my 7 children and my wife also runs through my head.  I decide to drive home. On the way home on the LIE there are flags and thank you signs hung on every overpass. Signs that said God Bless America, we shall overcome, united we stand and so many more. As I arrived home I was surprised to see that my kids had made a huge flag out of oak tag paper and cotton balls, then hung it on the front of our house, it was surrounded by Christmas lights and lit up the front yard. They had every flag we owned all around the yard. It made me proud.

9/13/01

Day Three

    After about 4 hrs sleep I arrived back at ground zero to start digging on the Liberty St. side. Up into the crater, seems like I never left. Working shoulder-to-shoulder again with fellow New Yorkers removing steel and debris. Some of the faces familiar, weren?t we next to each other yesterday, ? hey bill how are you? hey mike how are you? All day we removed steel, small pieces of concrete, rebar and bucket after bucket of dust and debris. Who is it? Do I know them? Were the questions that ran through my head as we gently passed down the stokes baskets with the dead, with the faces I couldn?t see. 
   
   You could hear the fighter jets passing overhead and the roar was tremendous, the first time they passed hundreds of people took off running thinking that it was another plane hijacked and going for another building. At one point a civilian, small aircraft came for a look and was chased away by two army helicopters, another scary moment.

     I had met a fireman from out of state and we had stayed together most of the day watching out for each other. We were under the pile about 30 or 40 feet digging by hand, cutting wires with wire cutters and cutting rebar with bolt cutters trying to find pockets large enough for survivors. Filling buckets and passing them up through the hole. As we went down into one area we came across things from the store that was on the observation deck. It was an eerie feeling, a post card came down from above me and was undamaged, not a scratch or dust on it. It said on the back ( Top of The World / NY?s Theme Park in The Sky).  Time for a break, we come out of the hole and go down to burger king (NYPD Headquarters) for something to eat and some coffee. The owner of this burger king never shut his doors. He served food to the firemen, police and civilian volunteers from the beginning till there was none left. Then the Red Cross and others delivered the food there. It became a meeting place and a place to get dry clothes, socks, boots, rain gear and almost anything else you needed.  
   
    There is still hope. Standing on the top of the iron beams that stuck out at odd angles handing down buckets of debris, a fireman say?s ?Did you here that? hold up hold up everybody quiet ?Did you here that? another fireman say?s yea I heard someone. Now all of us on the top of this mountain of steel try to stay quite as this fireman tries to communicate with this person. Hello are you there? Silence. Hello are you there? Then yes I?m here. What?s your name, no response. Is there anyone else with you?  He answers Yes one other. The fireman yells we have two, a cheer goes up. 

    Three horns everyone out, a scramble to get out of the crater again, fear on the faces of everyone, which building this time. Some of us got used to the horns and stayed behind to help the fireman, police and volunteers down out of the crater. Same drill same faces. After everyone was off the crater we went down to the street. 

      It?s three thirty pm; I have to meet my brother Tom and his son. He?s looking for his girlfriend Linda, she was on the 92nd floor of tower #2, and she had called her mother and said she was fine. Then called back a short time later and said they were told to wait for an escort out of the building. After that she wasn?t heard from. 

    Desperation on his face searching hospitals, we went to the NYC Downtown hospital to check their lists. No lists have been updated since Wednesday. As I waited for Tom I sat with my nephew Tom Jr. tired and filthy and watched all the other people trying to locate their sisters, brothers and girl friends with a sorrow in my heart so deep it?s to hard to explain and most times to hard to talk about. A man and his wife came up to me and asked me if there is any hope of finding anyone, he was looking for his brother. I told him there is always hope. I told him that the way the steel and concrete floors came down that there is sure to be pockets that people could survive in. He thanked me several times for helping. He walked away with tears in eyes. As he walked away, my own tears came. I knew deep down that there were very slim chances that anyone was still alive. 

    It?s hard to look at my brother without breaking down. He is a rock on the outside doing what needs to be done. The questions he must have, where are they, so many lost so little found, I wish I had the answer. We go to the armory on 28th and Lexington to check their lists and post a photo and info about Linda. He tells me to leave them here there are things he has to do. He?ll take a cab home. We hug. He is my big brother, he gives me strength, and I love him.

    I go back to ground zero and ask about the two people that we had found before the three horns went off, no one can give me an answer, no one knows, I have to assume that they were not recovered alive. Again hundreds of people in lines by twos, we remove steel, small pieces of concrete, rebar and bucket after bucket of dust and debris. The fireman crawling into tunnels that were dug by hand still searching still hoping. The courage of these men makes you proud; to see them in full gear climbing in and out of the rubble that was once the World Trade Center, searching for survivors and their fallen brothers, not giving up, brings tears to your eyes.

9/14/01

Day Four

    We arrive at ground zero Dolores Nicoletti and I. It?s raining and cold. As we look up, a sole figure stands on top of the steel beams, an ironworker; he?s making plans to remove the huge pieces of I-beam that form what looks like the outer rim of a volcano. Tom Hayes my brother in-law is this ironworker he was here when the buildings came down, working since Tuesday with very few hrs of sleep, we talk for a while, he has his job to do. Moving over to the Temporary Police HQ (Burger King) we meet up with my brothers Jim and Mike, they were here since 4:30 am helping the Battalion Chief try to get into the path train area and the restaurant area, Mike was a maintenance manager there for some years. They could not reach either one.                 

    There is a stand down inside the crater right now. The heavy equipment starts to move in, staging areas were cleared out all week. Huge cranes that can reach into the center of the crater to pickup the steel that the ironworkers cut away are setup. Cranes so big that the George Washington Bridge was shut down for regular traffic because of their weight. I think it?s starting to become a recovery effort more than a rescue. We grab shovels and brooms working with the sanitation department most of the day to help clean up around the American Stock Exchange so it can open on Monday. The stand down is over, back into the crater, most of the faces are now new. We remove steel, small pieces of concrete, rebar and bucket after bucket of dust and debris.

    As night starts to fall, stairway #1 of Tower #2 is located and the remains of firemen are found. 

    A terrible thing to witness, no more stokes baskets no need to hand them down the line. The bags are smaller now.

    Leaving ground zero, going down West Street, Dolores, Tom and I were greeted by thousands of people lined up along West Street waving flags and thank you signs, cheering, holding candles and yelling God Bless America all the way to 34th Street. These were the stockbrokers, marketing people, lawyers, the people that run New York City, cheering the men and women that keep New York City running, the grunts, the electricians, the plumbers, the carpenters, the ironworkers and so many more. The feeling of being an American never felt stronger than that moment, the unity I felt with my fellow Americans was overwhelming and tears came to my eyes. 

    As I lay in bed with my wife in my arms, there are uncontrolled sobs and tears I can?t stop. For a while, she holds me and comforts me, she had done this all week, I know that things will be ok. My kids all in bed sleeping, earlier I tried to explain what had happened and what was going to happen, I think they understand and are not afraid.

9/15/01

Day Five

    The National Guard takes over. 

As I stood there in front of the plaza area, a Guardsman came over to me and said that it was time for me to leave. I told him that I was there all week and he told me there was nothing else I could do, that I should go home and get some rest. I knew he was right I had to leave the rest of this up to the professionals, the people sworn to protect and serve. 

    Leaving the place that was once the World Trade Center I was emotionally and physically drained. It was then that I started to feel the full impact of what I had witnessed and gone through. I went to moms house. The tears kept coming. Crying in my fathers? arms I knew I would get through this.   

    Country, Duty, Honor and the willingness to help others are byproducts of my upbringing; my parents are wonderful people who instilled these values in me from a very young age. We are proud of our name, to be Irish and most of all to be American.

My Family was there when our friends and fellow New Yorkers needed us most.
I am proud to be a Donovan
I love them all

May our Father in Heaven be watchful and grant peace and comfort to all of the lives that have been touched by this horrific tragedy that has fallen upon our homeland on this day?
May the Angels wrap their wings about those that have been lost and those that are grieving with the loss of their loved ones?


? William Donovan 9/19/01
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