story11068.xml

story11068.xml

born-digital

story

yes

no

2004-09-15

I got in to work around 9AM and immediately someone said that a plane had hit the WTC. I thought it was an accident and went into my office. I am chief attorney at my company and we had another attorney, a good friend, who worked remotely from Reston VA. We were set up to have a teleconference but when I called her she was very distraught and told me in a very broken voice that her partner, a pilot for American Airlines, had taken off that morning, she didn't know where he was headed and she heard that it was an AA plane that hit the WTC. I immediately got off the phone and went into the TV room to see if I could get any information that would help her.The news was already on and some people in the company were watching. In the meantime the other plane had hit and the newscaster was saying that it was a deliberate attack.

I was speechless. I grew up in Florida but my family came from the NY area and when I was 12 they took me to NYC to visit family. I fell in love with the place and decided that I would move there at the first opportunity. So when I finished college my husband and I, with our toddler daughter, did. I worked at NYU. My first job. I moved away to go to graduate school but always felt that NYC was my spiritual home. So when the planes hit I felt as if my home town had been attacked.

As I was watching, all of a sudden there was just a big cloud at the south tower. I said "I can't see it! What happened?" It was gone. I was in shock. When the other tower went down I broke down crying. I couldn't believe it. It felt like a movie except that it also felt too real. Who could speak?

They evacuated the Cleveland downtown and our building. I stayed a couple of hours and watched the news. I called my friend. Her partner's plane had been re-routed to land in Kansas City. Thank God he was ok.

I went home and watched the news until bedtime. For the next two weeks, at least, I watched the news every minute I wasn't at work. All I could think about was the people I thought were still trapped, hurt, in the ruins. I was hoping to see rescues.

I was scheduled to present a talk at a law conference in London later that week. I thought that the conference would be cancelled for sure, out of respect. They didn't cancel it. I had done considerable preparation for the talk but I just could not go. I wasn't afraid to fly but I felt it was so unseemly to go on with business as usual when all those people were still missing and, presumably, hurt.

The shock diminished with time, of course, but it never has gone. On the anniversaries I spend the day quietly at home. I watch the memorial and tapes that I made. Remembering. I feel that I am paying my respects. My heart goes out to the families, but mostly to the people who died in such a horrible and useless way.

I know that the site has to be rebuilt, if only to make a statement. But a large part of me would like the entire site to be a memorial.